Betty Ann Spencer, Attorney

Imagine a different kind of divorce. Maybe we could call it the better divorce. Some commentators have called it "the smart divorce." This divorce provides parties with all the support and care they need in the divorce process. It is a divorce that features respectful negotiations; preserves significant relationships; puts the concerns of children center stage, and helps the parents build good co-parenting skills. This is the divorce where both lawyers are committed to helping the parties reach an agreement based on the core economic and emotional needs of each. This divorce is called "the Collaborative Practice Divorce".

The collaborative practice divorce utilizes a team of very well trained lawyers, mental health professionals acting as coaches for the parties and child specialists (a mental health professional who brings the voice of the child into the divorce process) and various financial professionals who are needed in the divorce process. A neutral financial professional is available to analyze the families' financial data in order to determine whether the choices made by the parties will provide satisfactory financial outcomes two, five, ten or twenty years into the future. The parties control the process and the outcome.

Betty has been involved in collaborative practice work since the late 90s. She is a member of The Collaborative Council of the Redwood Empire and the International Academy of Collaborative Practice .

Betty is also a skilled mediator. Mediation requires many of the same skills required by collaborate practice. She has been trained as a mediator by Joan Kelly, Ph.D. who developed high conflict mediation in Marin County in the 80s and Gary Friedman, a lawyer mediator, who is an internationally known, trainer for people aspiring to be family law mediators.

Divorce is associated with depression, anger, bitterness and grief. Divorce is an ending and a new beginning. Betty particularly enjoys working with people who are willing to put energy into making their lives better - that means feeling more comfortable with themselves and transforming negative thoughts into positive energy. These are people who care about other people.

Betty also does "mediation to stay married". In Sonoma County we sometimes call the process "Retooling Your Marriage". In this forum the parties develop concrete solutions to their marital problems. The solutions form the basis for a written contract. This process was developed by Laurie Israel. Please see http://mediationtostaymarried.com. Betty is also a licensed marriage family therapist.