Martha Milam | Durham Family Lawyer

A native of Durham, North Carolina, Martha New Milam was born at Watts Hospital in Durham in 1956. She was educated in the Durham City and County public schools, graduating from Jordan High School in 1975. Martha graduated from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro in 1980 and the Wake Forest University School of Law in 1987. Martha is a North Carolina State Bar Certified Family Specialist, she is certified by the North Carolina Dispute Resolution Commission to conduct mediated settlement conferences in Family Financial cases and Martha is a certified Parenting Coordinator. Martha is also available to provide Arbitration Services under the the North Carolina FamilyLaw Arbitration Act.

Lawyer.com Member Questionnaire

Please describe a case(s) in the last year or two where you made a big difference.
1. Every contested custody case makes a big difference in the life of the child whose custody is the subject of the lawsuit between the child’s parents. I have handled hundreds of custody matters over the years of my practice and in most of them my clients and their children have benefited from my advice and representation.
2. A rising high school senior contacted me to learn what he must do to become emancipated. His parents had thrown him out of their home because he was gay and would not agree to “renounce that lifestyle”. Fortunately, his best friend’s family gave him a home and he had a part-time job to fund his incidental expenses, He was an excellent student and all-around good guy who had the dream of going to UNC and of becoming a lawyer. However, in addition to throwing him out of the home, his parents also refused to pay for his college education. Therefore, he needed to become emancipated so he could fill out his financial aid applications without having to include his parents’ income. I represented this young man and helped him to obtain his emancipation. Without this result, it would have been impossible for him to have afforded to enroll in the college of his choice.

How did you build a successful practice?
1. Each client’s case is extremely important to them and to me. I work diligently on behalf of each client.

2. I do not take on more work than I can reasonably handle.

3. To the extent I have control of situations, I work to keep my clients from having unpleasant surprises.

4. Keeping my client informed is on the top of my list of priorities. Most client phone calls and e-mails are returned promptly. My clients receive a copy of any correspondence I receive in the client's case.

5. I never stop learning! This means constant reading and study of statutory law, appellate opinions, legal treatises, professional journals, and other materials concerning family law, family dynamics, intimate partner violence, the effects of conflict and trauma on family members in the context of separation and divorce, and the latest research on co-parenting. Between January 1, 2012 and December 31, 2016, I attended an average of 25 hours of Continuing Legal Education (CLE) most years; this is double the minimum CLE hours required by the NC State Bar.

7. I am a Family Law Specialist certified as such by the North Carolina State Bar Board of Legal Specialization. , I have maintained this certification continuously since January 5, 1995.

What should clients look for in a lawyer?
1. Honesty. There are no guarantees in Court. Therefore, an ethical lawyer will never tell you that she guarantees a particular result. Instead, an honest lawyer will discuss the strengths and weaknesses of your situation and help you to explore options for resolution.

2. Trustworthiness. Make sure your lawyer is in good standing with the N.C. State Bar and that she has an excellent reputation for ethical conduct. If your lawyer is a N.C. Certified Family lawyer Specialist, this means that, in addition to expertise in Family Law, your lawyer has demonstrated exemplary ethical conduct in her family law practice. If your lawyer has an AV Preeminent® rating from Martindale Hubbell, this means that other lawyers rank her at the highest level of professional excellence including ethical conduct.

3. Diligence. You need to know that your lawyer is working hard for you. Your lawyer demonstrates this to you by engaging in on-going communication with you throughout your case. The work being done and what it costs is best shown on the billing invoices your lawyer sends you on a regular basis.

4. Expertise. Make sure you hire a lawyer who is well equipped to represent you. If your lawyer is a N.C. Certified Family lawyer Specialist, this means she has demonstrated specific knowledge, skill and proficiency in the practice of Family Law and. If your lawyer has an AV Preeminent® rating from Martindale Hubbell, this means that other lawyers rank her at the highest level of professional excellence.

5. Compatibility. In Family Law matters you and your lawyer will be deal with issues which are very personal to you and quite emotionally laden. Therefore, all other things being equal, retain the services of a lawyer whom you like and who seems to understand you and your goals.

How important is local knowledge to the success of your cases?
Except in a rare circumstances, family law cases are conducted by the trial judge and there is not a jury. The trial judge is given broad discretion to make decisions and the only restraint on that discretion is that the judge must base his/her decisions on competent facts. For these reasons, an appeal to higher court is often unavailing. Consequently, in making trial strategy decisions it is very helpful if your lawyer has familiarity with how a particular judge has ruled in cases having facts similar to yours.

What information can you provide in a free phone consultation?
I do not conduct free initial consultations either by phone or in person. I charge a flat fee of $300.00 for an Initial Consultation and the consult usually lasts about 1 hour. When a person calls to schedule an Initial Consultation, he or she will speak with my Legal Assistant. It is helpful for the caller to have the name, address and contact information for the other party/spouse/parent. If the other party/spouse/parent has a lawyer, please have that information also ready to share. Callers should realize that this only a scheduling call and that my legal assistant cannot and will not provide any legal advice nor will she be in a position to give you any sort of estimate of what your case will cost. Toward the conclusion of your Initial Consultation, you and I will discuss fee estimates.

What differentiates you from other lawyers in your community?
I keep my practice small so that I can provide personal handling of each client’s legal matter. My certification as a Family Law Specialist means you can rest assured that I am qualified to represent you. In addition to my legal training and experience, I am also trained and experienced in the Mediation, Arbitration, Parenting Coordination, and Collaborative Law Process. Armed with all of these skills, I am able to offer each client is to advocacy with sound advice.

What is the most rewarding aspect of your job?
Seeing the relief in a client’s face as he or she begins to understand that with my help, there is a light at the end of what earlier felt like a very dark and scary tunnel.

What are your other interests in addition to law?
Attending performances at DPAC, Modern Dance, Ballet, Pilates, Reading and spending time with family and friends

• Association of Family and Conciliation Courts | Member | 2006 - Present
  International Academy of Collaborative Professionals | Member | 2000 - Present
  American Bar Association, Family Law Section | Member | 1990 - Present
  North Carolina Association of Women Attorneys | Board of Directors | 1990 - Present
  North Carolina Bar Association | Member | 1987 - Present
  Durham County Bar Association Member 1987- Present

• North Carolina Super Lawyers | 2008-2017
  AV Preeminent rated by Martindale Hubbell

Martha New Milam has been a Premium Member since August 08, 2017.
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• Martha Milam