In twenty-eight years of practicing law I have litigated hundreds of divorce cases. Each case is different from every other case, in many ways. However, there are some things which are similar. One common pitfall for a divorcing couple is to allow emotions to over-ride their otherwise sound decision making and negotiating skills. Your needs are too important to risk losing something that you are entitled to receive because your emotions prevented you from thinking clearly. That is one reason why it is so important that you obtain sound legal counsel to protect your interests, because your attorney will be able to negotiate on your behalf without allowing emotions to cloud this process. One need which should be met in nearly every case where there are children involved is for the couple to reach an agreement for the care, custody and support of their children during the period of separation. The Code of Virginia, §20-103, allows the court to make orders in pending divorce cases for the custody, support and visitation of the children. In certain situations it is necessary for the court to order exclusive possession of the marital residence as well. Many divorcing couples create a "Property Settlement Agreement" that resolves all issues of property, pensions, child custody and child (and/or spousal) support. It is not advisable to sign such an agreement without consulting with an attorney because you might forfeit some rights or property that you are entitled to receive. One thing an attorney can do for you is to verify the true amounts (through the process of discovery) which are held in pensions and/or other retirement accounts as well as finding the actual value of marital property. If you sign an agreement without verifying the amounts in these accounts and/or without verifying the value of the marital property you might waive your right to determine what is the true amount(s) that you are entitled by law to receive. If you do not ask the court to order who has custody of the children during the time of separation, then the other parent can take the children and keep them many states away and that is perfectly legal. 1 Court ordered custody and visitation can protect your right to be with your children during the separation period. For these reasons, in most cases it is advisable to request that the court will issue a formal order whereby the terms of your agreement are enforceable by law during the period of separation. If the court doesn't issue such an order your agreement is not enforceable during the period of time before the divorce becomes final.