If your ex isn’t following your custody agreement, it can cause stress and disrupt your child’s routine. Missed drop-offs, schedule changes without notice, or refusal to return your child are serious matters. Pennsylvania custody orders are legally enforceable, giving you options if your ex refuses to comply.
Step 1: Stay Calm and Communicate
Not every custody violation is intentional. Your ex may have misunderstood the schedule or faced an emergency. Try to resolve issues calmly through respectful text, email, or conversation.
Even if resolved, keep a record of what happened—documentation is important if violations continue.
Step 2: Document Every Violation
Track any breaches of your custody order. Documentation helps the court understand the pattern of violations.
Include:
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Dates and times of missed or late exchanges
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Descriptions of what happened
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Screenshots of messages
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Witness names, if applicable
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Police reports, if relevant
Use a written log or calendar app to keep everything organized.
Step 3: Talk to a Child Custody Lawyer
If violations continue, contact a family law attorney. A lawyer can:
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Review your custody order
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Explain your rights
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Advise on legal custody enforcement
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Take action in court if needed
An experienced attorney may resolve issues with a warning letter before going to court. If your child’s well-being is at risk, they can also help file for contempt or request custody modifications.
Legal Actions in Pennsylvania
Formal Warning Letter:
A lawyer can send a letter outlining the violations and potential legal consequences. This often stops further issues without court involvement.
Motion for Contempt:
If violations are repeated, your lawyer can ask the court to find your ex in contempt. Possible consequences include fines, makeup parenting time, counseling, or changes to custody.
Custody Modification:
If violations put your child at risk or the agreement no longer works, you can request a change. Pennsylvania courts require a substantial change in circumstances and consider the child’s best interests.
When to Call the Police
Contact law enforcement only if your child is in immediate danger or being unlawfully withheld. For minor schedule issues, it’s usually better to consult your attorney first.
What Not to Do
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Don’t withhold your child or break the order yourself.
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Don’t involve your child in disputes or speak negatively about the other parent.
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Don’t wait too long to take action; repeated violations that go unaddressed may weaken your case.
Document the behavior and contact a lawyer promptly.
Get Help from a Pittsburgh Custody Lawyer
If your ex is violating your custody agreement, you don’t have to face it alone. Pittsburgh Divorce & Family Law helps parents enforce custody orders and protect children’s best interests.